‘the balled realm of duntellya’

so, i am sitting here again,

trying to find out who i am,

what i am,

or, what i really am,

losing control of my inner self,

gaining control of hate,

by you and by me,

only to learn,

that i just wanna die,

so that you can live on,

bloom,

be something better,

and never have to think of me again,

Then i stop to wonder,

why is this happening this me,

it made me remember,

the deal i made,

with the devil,

to feel pain,

so that others might feel the ease,

i am still enjoying it,

but i don’t know about you.

I am simply not ready for this.